Growing in Recovery

 

Growing in Recovery

And the child grew and became strong in spirit, and he lived in the desert until he appeared publicly to Israel. Luke 1:80

 
This is a picture of my recovery plant. It was given to me by two of my cabinet members (see chapter on CBL) five years ago when I entered treatment facility for the last time, they presented it to me one year after I had completed the program. It was a small plant when I got it and it has grown in these five years. I looked at it the other day and did some serious reflections on my life since it was given to me. This plant symbolizes a lot about my life in just the last five years

How has my plant grown? It has been reasonably healthy, simple as that. Despite the fact that it has went without water and sunlight some days (if it could talk it would have a lot of things to say!) If you look close you can see some of the leaves even now have signs of damage but it has survived. The verse above states that "Jesus grew and became strong in spirit…" We hear often that we should "grow in Christ". How do we grow? I like how my Pastor states it: "if you want to grow you need to be healthy" If we are healthy then we will grow and we stay healthy by putting the right things in our minds and spirit just as we would our bodies. Jesus took in his spirit and "grew" because he stayed healthy by not allowing the temptations of this life to affect his relationship with the Father. Whenever I cease to grow it's because I am not healthy and if I'm not healthy it's because I'm not taking in the right things that will keep me so.

You will also notice on the plant that there are some leaves that are brown and dying. I knew someone who always pick the dead leaves off of plants, so much so that it became a daily ritual with her, I ask one day why she was so obsessed (at least in my opinion) with taking the leaves off "don't they just fall off anyway once they are dead, I asked?. She explained that when a leaf dies and remained attached to the plant or tree if it doesn't fall off or not removed the plant will divert all of its energy to trying to bring the leaf back to life and thus the other leaves will be neglected and the plant will eventually die. Some of us have dead leaves in our lives that need to be removed but we spend all our energy trying to bring that dead leaf part of us back and thus everything in our lives get neglected.

Are you trying to revive a relationship that needs to die? Need to get rid of old using friends but are holding on to them because you think they have some value? Whatever area of recovery you are in; take a look at the leaves that need to come off of your life.

My prayer is that we continue to "grow through what we are going through"

 

Devotions

2 Peter 3:18 (NIV)
⁸ But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever! Amen.

1 Peter 2:2 (NIV)

Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation,

 

Excerpts from (soon to be published Book) - "Musings from a Ex-Crackhead"

Author-Tim Cross

 

Batman and a lesson in Recovery

No matter how old I get I will never stop watching cartoons! I could tell you that they bring memories of childhood (which they do) or I just watch them with my grandkids (which I do) but the truth of the matter I watch them because I still like them! I was watching the Cartoon Network the other day and came across my favorite group- “The Justice League of America” remember those guys? (and girls) This particular episode the league was fighting an alien from outer space and they were getting their butts kicked big time. The alien knew each members special powers and as eliminated every hero’s power as he fought them. Eliminating Superman by exposing him to kryptonite, taking away Wonder Woman’s lasso, Destroying the Green Lantern’s lantern etc.
He finally comes to Batman and he says- “Why do you even want to fight me? I have defeated everybody else by getting to their special powers but you don’t even have any special powers this will be too easy!” Batman pauses and looks at the alien and says “That’s where you are wrong, I do have special powers? What powers? the alien sarcastically asks “that utility belt? You gotta be kidding?” No Batman replies…my power is “I never give up!”
One of the things my mother would consistently tell me throughout my life but especially through recovery is “Tim, never give up!” Life will have us depend on what we think is our special powers to get through life- job, career, talents, status etc. However when those things are gone we are lost and feel defeated. I just got a text from Nadine Nippard (Winning the World-FB) who reminded me of 1 Peter 5:8-9 “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks around like a roaring, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him..stand firm in the faith…Thinking about giving up? He didn’t! Jesus endured the cross for us…he never gave up because of his love for us!

Bruised Reeds and Smoldering Wicks-Annual Recovery Retreat

Ananepho Ministries
Third Recovery Retreat
Circle Y Bible Camp,
Bangor, Michigan
August 20-23, 2009
Theme: Recovering from You
Children used reeds to make flutes in Biblical times. When the reeds were bruised or broken, they were discarded. Come join us - recover and make beautiful music again.
Don’t let the enemy make you feel alone. God has said He will not and has not forgotten about us! Bring your hurts, habits and hang-ups and leave with hope, healing and happiness! No matter what you are recovering from, we need you. Together we will receive God’s healing, grace and love.
Circle Y Bible Camp is a tranquil setting this retreat.
Our weekend together will be time well spent in the presence of the Lord. Registration is $120 per person and includes meals and accommodations. The camp is located at 65361 34th Avenue, Bangor, MI 49013. www.circleyranch.org
…that they may recover themselves 2 Tim 2:26

Ananepho Ministries, led by Rev. Tim Cross, is a ministry of New Life Christian Fellowship, located in Chicago Heights, IL.

Ananepho is a Greek word that translates “to return to soberness.” In that vein, the ministry focuses on helping believers break the emotional, spiritual, social and chemical bondage that tries to inhibit victorious living in Christ. Ananepho sponsors quarterly fellowships and a weekly Celebrate Recovery® support group which meets one Saturday a month, 10:00 a.m. until noon. at New Life Christian Fellowship, 1645 Wilson Avenue in Chicago Heights. The support group does not require church affiliation.
For more information visit our blog at:
www.newlifeananepho.blogspot.com or
call 708-990-7865
Our Speakers





Pastor Rick Thomas, author of the powerful gripping autobiography “The Prodigal Son”, From Dope Dealer to Hope Dealer…..a true story of Redemption, Restoration and Forgiveness.
Pastor Thomas strayed away from his spiritual upbringing and became a drug dealer, user and felon, that was caught up in a life of crime and many addictions for over twenty five years.
He is now a Pastor, Lecturer, Biblical Counselor, Motivational Speaker, Missionary and Author. He travels nationally and internationally spreading the message that “There Is Hope” for all people, from the high and mighty to the homeless and helpless.
Pastor Thomas is the Senior Pastor of Faith Tabernacle Church of Highland Park, Michigan and the Executive Director of Prodigal Son Ministries.


Demetry English, over 25 years sober and an outstanding conference and retreat speaker. Demetry is a deaconess at Rosedale Park Baptist Church in Detroit, Mich and a dynamic woman of God with a message to tell about God’s Grace and Mercy. She is a sponsor to many over the years and has been married to jazz musician Ron English for over 30 years. Demi, as she is affectionately known, keeps it real and will challenge us to “grow through what we are going through”!

Audiences who hear Temperance Renee Cross-Jackson are both captivated and ministered to as her thought-provoking and personal lyrics penetrate hearts through spoken word and song. Temperance has seen her ministry bear the fruit of comfort, love, healing, peace and instruction that can only come from Word-based lyrics and a submitted life to match.

Recovery Brunch

 

Ananepho Ministries /Celebrate Recovery Ministries

Of New Life Christian Felowship Church invite you it's

Recovery Brunch

"God's Will and your Recovery"

Speaker- Pastor Haman Cross Jr.- Senior Pastor, Rosedale Park Baptist Church
(via-video tape)

Where: New Life Christian Fellowship

1645 Wilson

Chicago Heights,Il

 

When: July 25^th- 10am-12pm

Cost: free

Call-708-755-7900 for more info

Whatever u are recovering from....drugs,abuse,divorce or just life on life's terms....Come fellowship as we allow God to heal us from life's hurts, habits and hangups!

Our speaker: Pastor Haman Cross Jr. Haman is a down to earth, keep it real, urban pastor who has answered the call to have a global and local impact for Christ. He has been faithful to the call for over three decades and has ministered to hundreds of thousands from every walk of life. His transparency about personal failures and recovery has been a source of hope to thousands. Haman's some times hard hitting and unique style, coupled with a skillful use of humorous anecdotes, allows him to present the word of God in a way that leads people of all ages, races and cultures to a deeper spirituality. Whether pastors, prisoners, athletes, entrepreneurs, paupers or aristocrats Haman's message is consistent: "Grow! Glow! Go!"

 

 

Butterfly on God's Shoulder

It is said that if God had a sister it would be Malettor Cross... My mother went to be with the Lord on July 4th...God granted her own independence from this world. She was truly a woman of God. Her favorite verse that motivated her into ministry was "The fruit of the righteous is a tree of Life and he that winneth souls is wise..Prov. 11:30" In addition to raising 11 children and being the wife of a Pastor she spent the majority of her life ministering to children through children's Bible clubs in the public schools in Detroit. She was also a very popular speaker at conference's across the country. along with my Dad~Pastor Haman Cross Sr. they founded Detroit's Afro-American Mission in the late 60's pionenering inner-city work among Detroit's homeless and destitute. Bringing a message of God's love.mercy and grace through clothing give-aways, food pantry bible studies and numerous youth programs at a time when this type of work was unprecedented.

My mother meant more than I can ever write about in every area of my life but espy in the last 15 years in my recovery and all the struggles that came in between. she absolutly never gave up on me...and as the song says by Marvin Sapp..I truly never would have it..without her. A mother's love is truly next to God's love.

I miss you Mama..more than anything...fly away Butterfly and rest on God's shoulder...

Iron Sharpens Iron

I am so excited to not only get back to blogging...but tell you about our new men's support group that meets every Monday Morning- from 10- 12 (although we go longer than that!) We are simply men (women's group to form later)that meet to hold each other accountable, encourage each other and to get into God's word. Many of us are in recovery others are just seeking direction and support from other brothers in the body. We are Pastors, laborers, professionals, teachers, -from all aspects of life. Pray for us as we seek God's direction for where he wants to take us.


We will be hosting our first -one day confernce in October....our theme will be "Who dropped You"..from 2 sam 2:4....look for details soon. But before that happens -Ananepho Ministries is extremly excited about our third recovery retreat this year. We will be at Circly y Bible Camp...I will have a separate post on that later.

Consecration- Worship

Consecration- Day One

This is my first day of consecration during these 40 days. Thanks for reading and looking in. Why consecration? Why 40 days? I’ll get into more details about that later but I wanted to look at what is consecration? There are several Greek and Hebrew words that render consecration. They all point to the same thing: setting apart a person or thing for worship to the Lord. God has been dealing with me for the past month on worship. My real worship has been sporadic at best. My good friend and Pastor Dwight Knight was recently at my church and stated this in his sermon- “anybody can praise him but you need to be qualified to worship him” Wow!-Powerful and true statement. Worship requires a clean heart and hands. I’ll have more to say on that later.
This has been a very difficult season in all areas of my life. I have tendency to not be transparent when I really need to be. Struggle with trying to keep up an image of what I think I should be and how that should look to other people. My barometer of measurement seems to always be measured by the wrong thing. As my Pastor says…”when you judge yourselves by the wrong standard...you will always come up with the wrong measurement” As I face life issues on life’s terms…God is convicting me that my worship is not what it should be. Worship should not be an event but at experience. Adam and Eve experienced worship and relationship with God...Continuously until that was interrupted by sin…then worship began to be an event. I desire to stay in his presence and experience him like never before…despite of what is happening around me and what the circumstances seem to be.

Ps 63:3- Because your love is better than life...my lips will glorify you…

Oprah and Purpose Driven Life

I get teased a lot about watching Oprah Winfrey. I was home recently and my brothers (and even some of my sisters) really let me have it for watching Oprah. No, this isn’t about supporting Oprah or advocating for her program or what she does. However I remember when she announced plans for her school for girls in Africa, one of the things that she repeated in 2005 while speaking at Mt Olivet Church in Cleveland Ohio was “I’m thankful to God that I know who I am. That I am his child first and foremost and that I understand the meaning and purpose of my own life."Pastor Rick Warren of Saddleback Church in Calf wrote the awesome book “Purpose Driven Life” which has changed people lives all over the world including mine in helping us see that we are here for a purpose and our relationship with God reveals that purpose. Knowing and discovering your purpose is more than just “I want to treat people right and love God and go to church, etc, etc, yada yada yada!” There is a purpose that God has for me and you to do- that no one else can do! It doesn’t mean that it won’t get done- but if we don’t step up and be obedient- it won’t get done the way that God had ordained it. There have been many people criticizing Oprah for one reason or the other- again I’m not here to defend Oprah’s life, matter of fact many of the things she is associated with I am in total disagreement with, but I cant remember the last time I have heard prominent Christian leaders say “This is my purpose this is what God has ordained for me to do" It appears there is so much attention on getting the mega church and all that comes with it, but not a lot about purpose and why we are here. Some have even let the book “Purpose Driven Life” be just another spiritual phase almost like a fad. God has convicted me recently about my purpose.
Here is another news flash- our recovery isn’t about us! God has called many of us to our purpose, however our habits, hurts, hang-ups have detoured us from that purpose and what God wants to accomplish in our lives. I once heard Bishop Noel Jones say- “your mess don’t cancel your calling” Pastor Tony Evans in his book “Time to Get Serious” talks about Jonah and his running away from what God had called him to do. Dr. Evans states “ when you are obedient God pays the ticket but when you run from God – you get to pay the ticket” Jonah ran 2500 miles headed for Tarshish and the city of Nineveh was actually about 550 miles from his home! Once he got back and obeyed God- he still had to make the original trip anyway! Many of us are paying a high price for our Tarshish trip when if we had done it God’s way, he would have picked up the tab”. There are things that have happened to us and Satan has meant for those things to be our demise, however God wants those very things to be the catalyst for us to fulfill our unique purpose that he has called you and I to do. It’s an invitation to join him in what he is doing and going to do! He’s waiting for you to RSVP!
Reflection: Do you know what your unique purpose is? How has your recovery hindered or helped you see that purpose?

What"s My New Name?

Crackhead, Crackhead, Crackhead!
(What’s my new Name?)

Another show I watch (my youngest daughter doesn’t understand why) is one of the court TV shows- Judge Greg Mathis. I like Judge Mathis style and most of his comments.(Plus he’s from Detroit so he has to be ok!) Judge Mathis usually has some harsh comments for those who are in his court and have a substance problem. I remember watching one particular episode that involved a man who had a crack cocaine habit but was in denial and didn’t like when Judge Mathis referred to him as a crackhead. At one point in speaking to the young man Judge Mathis said loudly and intensely – “Crackhead! crackhead! crackhead! That’s what I’m going to call you until you realize that’s what you are and get some help”. As I listened to the way he said those words- it hit home painfully. It reminded me of the years of not facing my addiction and all the names that I had been called over the years (crackhead has actually been one of the nicer words!)
We are labeled for what we do and get involved in. Those labels stick and become painful reminders of our past. Many of us can’t get past the names and labels of our past. Many times those around us wont let us forget-Divorcee, addict, whore, whoremonger, abuser, on and on. Revelation 2:17 (NIV) Says: He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it.
Stones were given for various reasons. Those sitting in judgment positions in ancient days gave their vote by either casting a white stone for innocence or black when they condemned.
J. Vernon McGee states- “The people of Asia Minor to whom John was writing had a custom of giving to intimate friends a tessera, a cube or rectangular block of stone or ivory, with words or symbols engraved on it. It was a secret, private possession of the one who received it. Well, Christ says that He is going to give to each of His own a stone with a new name engraved upon it. I do not believe that it will be a new name for you and me but that it will be a new name for Him. I believe that each name will be different because He means something different to each one of us. It will be His personal and intimate name to each of us”Awesome!
A new name! A name that has been given to us already-symbolizing what we are to him. I think that one of the reasons that he hasn’t told us what exactly the new name is, is because we probably would screw that up too! You know us , instead of realizing that the name indicates something different we would probably empathizing on telling people- “Hey! I got a new name! Guess what it is! Our focus should be that we are no longer- idiot, screw-up, no-good (and others that I can’t repeat). You and I may not know what exactly the new name is- but we do know it represents something far different than what we have been hearing and also what we have been living up to. I recall at one of the many recovery programs that I was in I had relapsed and had to go before all the residents in order to stay in the program. It was called the “hotseat”, I was placed in the center of the room and any resident who wanted to confront me and say anything they wanted and they certainly did! After everyone was through I had a short time to respond and I shouted back at everyone- “I’m an addict!!! That’s what addicts do!” I believed that if we were addicts then we were only doping what addicts do. One of the reasons I love the Celebrate Recovery® Program is that they have you indentify yourself this way “Hi My name is Tim I’m a believer who struggles with drugs, alcohol, pornography, etc (or whatever you struggle with). It’s important to realize that we don’t have to continue to be what people have labeled us to be. Don’t know what your new name is ? Don’t worry- he does and it reflects who you are to him
Reflection: How has the names that talk about your issues over the years affected you ?

Read : Isa. 62: 3-4, 65:15

Who Dropped You?

I don’t think there is anything more fulfilling after rearing your children than having grandchildren. There are many bonuses that come with the same - such as sending them home when you get tired of them!!
I remember one of the things that I did with my children that I and hundreds of other fathers do- “the ole toss them in the air routine” I remember their mother shouting at me- “you bet not drop my Baby!!!” The first time I would toss them of course they would cry, it wasn’t until after a few more times that they realized that their father would not drop them that they enjoyed being tossed and knowing that I would catch them. Matter of fact they looked forward to the game of being tossed and caught by their Dad. Being a Grandfather (actually a great-grandfather!) I now have the privilege of doing this with my grandchildren. Some of us have been emotionally dropped in our lives. Damaged, crushed,scarred because of the actions of someone else.
One of the greatest stories about being dropped, restoration and forgiveness is the Biblical story of a young man in the Old Testament named Mephibosheth. Mephibosheth was the Grandson of King Saul, and son of Jonathan . David was now King of Israel. As a rule the incoming King would kill all the relatives of the outgoing King to insure no one could later claim a right to the throne. David is enjoying success as a King and everything is going well. He asks his staff – “Is there anyone from the house of Saul that I can show kindness to for Jonathan’s sake? He is told that Jonathan has a son living in the land of LoDebar- (name means desolation, or no pasture) named Mephibosheth. When he was five years old the nurse caring for Mephibosheth dropped him as she ran while fleeing those that had come to kill the remaining family members of Saul and Jonathan. Both his feet were broke in the fall and as a result he walked with a limp. He lived from place to place always looking over his shoulders wondering if someone would recognize him. LoDebar was a desolate place, nothing grew there thus its meaning, a place where the rejects, those that had been labeled as worthless, no-accounts, no-gooders, the “can’t get it together” people of society. Mephibosheth felt comfortable here. No one really cared where he was from, it was all about survival. Then one day the Kings men find him and bring him to King David. I can imagine what was going through his mind during what had to be the most terrifying ride he had ever taken. Perhaps he thought- “This is it!” I’m finally caught! My life is over!!” he comes before David and David calls his name- “Mephibosheth?” “Yes My Lord he answers” David explains that he knew Meph’s Daddy and talks about their friendship. He goes on to explain that from now on he is to live and eat at the Kings table and no longer has to work for anything! It doesn’t sink in with Meph, he responds to David “What does the King want with a dead dog like me?” I can’t even walk right King David? Isn’t that like us? We let our circumstances determine where we think we should be. I’m an addict Lord! A drunk! I’ve got issues? Failed marriages, failed career, I can’t complete anything! On and on we go. David goes on and calmly tells him “You will forever eat at my table!” What awesome words. From a place of “no pasture” to the kings table.
That nurse trying to save Mephibosheth life didn’t mean to drop him; she was trying to save him. Many of us have been dropped perhaps while someone was trying to save us. A father walking out on us, a mother abandoning us, or perhaps someone who didn’t protect us from the abuse we encountered. As a result many of us bear the emotionally scars from the fall. We go through life limping. We medicate our feelings from the pain, doing whatever it takes to conceal that we walk with a limp, being comfortable with only those that have a limp like ours. I suffered being dropped and certainly did my share of dropping those I love. Who dropped you? Was it your mother, father, uncle, close friend? Society? Or perhaps you may have been the one who did the dropping, I may not know who dropped you, but I do know that what is more important is that you and I are invited to the Kings Palace. Welcome to the Kings table- crippled feet and all!!

Obedience and Discipleship

As I look forward to 2009 –two things that God has convicted me that I’m lacking in (two that are outstanding) - Obedience and Discipleship. God requires strict obedience to his word. That obedience can’t be dependent –on what how God did something in the past. It’s the “how” that we get caught up in. Example: Moses was told to strike the rock in Exodus 17:5. However he was told to SPEAK to the rock in Numbers 20:11. Moses even says- “Must WE bring water from this rock …” and as you know this sin of disobedience caused him to not go into the promise land. Disobedience has always been man’s downfall, from the beginning right up until today. Moses perhaps thought- “Hey the last time I struck the rock..even though God said speak to it..I’ll strike it because .because I struck .water came out last time” But God said….”Because you didn’t trust me enough..to honor me you will not bring this community to the land I promised” We can’t even rely on our past experience with God instead of hearing what God has to say now. He may tell us to do something different in the same situation! We get caught up in traditions and how “we used to do it” God says- “Obey me” period! Disobedience caused the children of Israel to suffer at the Battle of Ai (Joshua 7) You will notice that Joshua did NOT inquire of the Lord on this occasion as he had before. He sent spies who came back and said..”everybody doesn’t need to go up..” They got beat back and when Joshua did ask the Lord why..he replied that there was sin in the camp, however Joshua would have known this had he asked the Lord before he sent the men up. The point is God does not compromise on obedience…ask Saul..When told to destroy the Amalekities he listen to the people instead of doing what was told to him by the man of God. Samuel states powerfully…”To obey is better than sacrifice…and to heed better than the fat of rams (NIV) The children of Israel’s captivity was because of disobedience. Seventy years of captivity because they would not let the land rest..as they were told to do. Jesus says …”if you love me you will obey me” If we have a obedience problem we have a LOVE problem. We are soldiers in a Battle ( a war) and like Jack Nicholson’s line from “A Few Good Men”….”we follows orders or people die” I don’t know about you but I strict obedience to what God is saying…even when (especially when)…I want to do it my way….
Next…Discipleship…